I have five children now, and the task is almost too daunting at times. What task, you ask? Name one. Potty training, schooling, reading EACH child their books....if you have one child, times what you do times five and then try to neatly organize all of it into each day.
One of the issues I have had, and other moms make it sound so easy, but I want to instill work ethic and reward system without breaking my back and spending too much time on it. I had a "star" system, which was a little row of pockets that I had made and popsicle sticks with glittery stars on them. When the kids did something great, or I wanted to reward them, they got a popsicle stick with the star and put it in their individual pocket. Things were great for awhile, but the kids started "re-arranging" the stars in the pockets as well as other "favorite pastime" items (with the handcrafted stars) that they so enjoy doing when I run to the bathroom.
SO THEN, I found an application for my phone called iRewardChart. Yes, I have an iphone, so you may have to make the wall chart if you don't, but for all of the busyness and really, how little time I WANT to spend on charting chores and which child did what, this has worked out AWESOME.
You get to name your own rewards in the application for each child. Mackenzie was saving up and trying to get enough stars for Disney World (500 stars), but ended up trading in stars for money and got an American Girl doll and wardrobe instead. The excitement this sparked when she got her box in the mail was over the top. Megan and Max immediately wanted to make more stars and they ran out and cleaned up the entire yard, which has been our outdoor shoe collection area for a month. In the photo, Megan is cleaning off one of the shoes they found.
Michael, the three year old, is not that motivated by the stars, but I give him stars on purpose when he does certain things I personally REALLY want him to do on his own....wiping his bottom after poo-poo for instance, or DRESSING HIMSELF, for goodness sake....if he dresses himself, I make a BIG deal out of it, run get my phone, and let him give the stars to himself (they make a nice "ringing" sound with each additional star). I would give him 100 stars at once if he started dressing himself every day, but for now, it's two at a time.
Along with earning stars, one gets to LOSE stars. This is used sparingly, but lately has been VERY motivating for the kids at dinnertime. They don't eat, they lose 2 stars. No sweating, nagging, begging, bantering, and stomach upset...just put the "weight" of the deal on the kids. Now that they are enjoying some of the rewards of "getting" the stars, having them taken away is hard to swallow. No pun intended. Brussel sprouts and asparagus are now being eaten quite well.
With each child, I have certain things I want them to do as a habit alongside of the chores and jobs. For one, the girls like to wear their hair down but didn't like to brush it. For awhile, they could earn stars for brushing their hair daily. After it became a habit, the hair brushing star magically went away....I'm sure it was in the grocery line one day.... But that's how I use the star system with the iRewardChart on my phone. Not all rewards are monetary. Many involve our time-date night with dad is so many stars as well as video games on ipad....You can customize the rewards as well as the chores with each child that you have....I may start a chart in there for my husband as well as the dogs. Well worth the .99 cents or whatever this app cost for a mom of five.
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