max going pottyA lot of people think they have me pegged when they hear "home birth". They think I'm vegan and I have two king size beds pushed together and we all are one big happy vegan homeschooling co-sleeping family. Well, if you want to know what's for dinner...it's usually going to be BEEF.
So, all home birthers aren't vegan and still wear a bra after the birth is over. I also am not big on co-sleeping. I just can't do it. Yes, the baby sleeps with me for part of the night some nights. But I sleep better and she sleeps better when we have a little space between us. Usually, I have her bassinet or Moses basket or Miyo hammock in my room...for four days. After four days, I feel I MUST get some sleep, so I move the bed of choice into my closet. They will then sleep there for about three months or so and then move to their crib in their room. Every child is different, but this four day deal has been the same all five times.
I personally like the closet because it's dark and away from the rest of the house, so I can keep it reasonably quiet and safe from the other children. Let's face it, the most hazardous moments in the baby's first year will be what the siblings may inflict or try to accomplish when mom's not around. I also found that when I had my second child, the first one appreciated saying good-bye and having her go into the closet for naps. It helped both of us gently incorporate number two into our lives as she slowly slept her way awake. By the time my first one was ready to have the other one around all of the time, the second one was awake more and could be around all of the time.
My favorite book for how to put baby on a schedule is Baby Wise by Gary Ezzo. That one book gave me more confidence as a mom than almost any other book out there. I am not legalistic about scheduling, but I am very conscious of "the schedule" and when things get a little rough, I immediately go back to looking at the clock, waking baby up after three hours, and squeezing in a couple of 2 hour feedings at night before bed. I like for my last feeding to be at 10:30PM. Baby wakes at 2:30 and at 6:30Am and the night is good when it's this predictable, I don't wake baby at night, just during the day if necessary. She sleeps so well in the Miyo hammock, I DO have to wake her during the day.
I have not been able to feed her at 10:30PM until last night. Every night she wakes early...9PM or 8:30 and acts as if she's starving. Last night, around 8:45, friends came over and wanted to hold her. We peeked in the Miyo baby hammock and she was getting restless so I got her out for them to hold. I THEN, put her in my personal sling and wore her. We went out into the driveway and talked and I patted her bottom and she lightly slept as long as I did this. I came in and did some chores and she continued sleeping until 10:30 when I woke her up and changed her, put her on the potty, and fed her. She then slept BEAUTIFULLY the rest of the night. It was the perfect night with a 2;30AM wakeup. i had had some sleep so I had the strength (after feeding her in our bed), to take her back to her bed, and then at 6:30Am...same thing. I felt like a new woman with just some good sleep behind me.
One note here. The potty. This is another interesting factoid that has worked and works beautifully with me and with our babies. When I change the baby's diaper, I take off the diaper and then I hold them underneath their thighs and with their back against my chest. I hold them either over the sink or sit and hold them on the toilet. This is called "infant potty training" and it's not really potty training, it's just letting them relieve themselves if they feel the "need". Mine are VERY responsive to this and from the first meconium poop, like to go anywhere but the diaper. Every single one of mine really enjoyed these moments and usually when they squirm and cry it's either tiredness, hunger, or NEED to go potty. Today, I was at the lawyers office with my husband and Miley would not be consoled, so I took her straight to the bathroom and she pooped right in the potty and then all was better. (and that's about all I'm going to say about THAT)
I had to post about scheduling because I think it gives new moms amazing confidence when they know WHY their baby is crying. By two weeks old, I can tell why my baby is crying and sometimes she's just tired and grouchy and I promptly put her in bed and let her cry. She's cried as long as 15 minutes and then I turn around and she's totally asleep for a couple of hours. I don't really rock my babies until they are older. No time, really. Also, I like for them to learn to go to sleep without any "props". Oh, another AWESOME book on sleep is HEalthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child-Marc Weissbluth-this one is great for all phases of life...BabyWise is more for the infant....but either way, instilling great sleep habits from the beginning is key to enjoying one another and both of you getting great sleep.
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